Tomorrow is VALENTINES DAY! Yay!!

And you know what that means??

It means it’s the perfect reason to go contact your ex if you haven’t done so for some time. Heck, even if you have contacted your ex recently, then still go ahead and shoot over a friendly email or text message telling them this:

Just dropping you a line to say “Happy Valentines Day”. Hope you have a good day. Cheers!

See how simple that was? And it was all non-threatening too.

The reason why you need to do this is to:

a) show your ex that you still care
b) show your ex that you’ve changed, and are willing to move on. (that’s why you didn’t get all deep with your email).
c) leave your ex with that nice feeling

So remember, tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, and it’s the perfect reason to drop your ex a line and let them know you’re still walking the planet.

Oh yeh, just before I forget!

Stay clear of those Valentines Day eCards.

They take too much effort, and shows your ex that you still see them as being more than just friends.

At this stage you want to play the cool cat, and not look like you are out on the sidelines waiting for them to come back with your tongue hanging out.

Keep it simple. Stick to email or a text message to their mobile.

Now for what I’m up to?

Off to an early breakfast by the beach followed by some rock climbing with my woman.

Let’s hope the weather’s good.

Cheers!

James

Well in today’s post, allow me to list the top 10 ways for women to capture the attention of a man across a crowded room or in a bar.

Granted, “Back Together Forever” is not about singles getting out there and picking up a lover. It’s about resolving a breakup and getting back with your ex. However, if you read between the lines, then you can use this top 10 list and adapt it to your situation.

By the way, if you are interested in picking up singles, then be sure to checkout Neil Strauss’ book on “The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists“. Almost all bookshops stock this book. Makes an interesting read.

(For Women Only)

1. Shoot over a beaming smile.
2. Flick your fringe or hair as you look at him.
3. Let your eyes fix on his for longer than normal.
4. Point to a spare chair near you and gesture him over to sit down.
5. Ask for his help with something.
6. Tilt your head and touch your chin or cheeks whilst looking at him.
7. Make yourself appear striking whilst looking at him.
8. Nod and smile.
9. Glide your hands over your body whilst holding his gaze.
10. Lick your lips whilst maintaining eye contact.

There you go.

In fact, Dr. Monica Moore, a psychologist at Webster University studied the signals of women when getting the attention of a man, and believe it or not, two-thirds of the time, the woman makes the first move!

So women out there… don’t be afraid to use your feminine qualities to attract your man back into your life.

• He’s always too busy to see you.
• He doesn’t call when he says he will. Let’s face it… It takes less than a minute to pickup the phone to call and say “hi”.
  100% of men said that they were never too busy to pickup the phone and call a woman that they were really in to.
• He doesn’t return your calls.
• He’s happy for you to see other people.
• He cheats on you.
• He only wants to see you late at night. Is he in a relationship with you just for those booty calls? Geez… I hope not.
• He tells you he just wants a casual relationship.
• He flirts with or ogles with women in front of you.
  Sure, guys love to look. But most guys have enough respect for their partner to keep their tongue in mouth when a bit of eye candy walks by.
• He’s not interested in you sexually.

So how did you fare?

Perhaps the writing’s on the wall if your boyfriend or husband shows signs of the above.

Remember the ‘ol saying…

You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.

Whilst this may be true in many cases, it’s now up to you to “entice” that horse to WANT to drink.

Bringing this philosophy into your relationship, it’s now up to you to “entice” your man to WANT to spend more time with you.

Your relationship is doomed to fail just yet. But these are definitely the warning signs that you need to do something now before it’s too late.

So go find the sweet spots that turn on your man. The things that he loves to do, find those things and do it with him.

Best of luck.

well, let's take the next step!!

There’s an old wives’ tale that says,

in order to truly know someone, you should date them through all four seasons – a full year – before getting married.

People change as the seasons change, so if you jump in too soon, you could be left with a sour taste in your mouth after six months.

So what happens when you’ve dated someone for a full year, you know you want to take the next step, but your partner is stuck on a rock unable to make up their mind?

Before you ask them if they’d like some syrup with their waffling, you’ll want to ask yourself some questions about your relationship.

Are There Better Options?

Is your relationship sizzling hot or is it just acceptable? Remember that settling down doesn’t mean you have to settle for less. If there are greener pastures just over the fence, then your partner may be thinking it’s time to jump and not commit to you.

What’s Your Family Like?

Does your partner mesh with your family or do they get on like oil and water?

Many times the deal breaker when deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone is whether they’d be able to tolerate your family.

How’s Money, Honey?

It doesn’t matter if you’re constantly broke or they are, money is an issue that tears couples apart. If your partner sees you as a sugar daddy (or worse yet, a mooch) then they won’t ever see you as an equal in the relationship.

Do You Trust Each Other?

Is there an inherent trust in your relationship? If you’re constantly worried the other person is going to leave you, then you’ll never feel comfortable saying “I do.”

Bad Habits

My friend once told me that after they had broken up, her ex-boyfriend told her that he could have never married her because she was too messy.

“I just saw myself having to follow you around, picking up after you for the rest of my life,” he said. “I couldn’t do it.”

What Will They Have To Give Up?

Being in a healthy relationship is all about compromise. You won’t be able to live the exact same lifestyle you had during your “single” days.

If your partner sees marriage being the end of their poker night or scrapbooking club, then they may not be ready to take the leap yet.

Parental Unit? No Thanks!

If you’re a single parent and your partner has no children, they may be wary about getting married because they aren’t ready to be a step-parent.

Location, Location, Location.

This happens with long-distance couples, but can also happen to local couples.

His dream is to retire in a cottage in Maine; her dream is a tiny efficiency in the heart of New York City. This may seem silly, but if you’re not happy where you are, it’s harder to be happy with the people you’re with.

Learning From Example

Some people shy away from marriage because they have seen so many marriages in their life go sour. This could be a worry for your partner, especially if they come from a broken home.

Just Not The One

If you’ve gone through all of these possibilities and not found one that rings true with your partner, maybe you’re just not right for each other.

There may not be any one specific thing that’s keeping you from tying the knot. Talk out all the possibilities with your partner and see if you can work through the reasons why they’re hesitant to say, “I do.”

Source: Associated Press

Cheating Men

Some guys will choose to break up with a woman rather than cheat on her. Either way, these are the reasons why your guy may be looking for greener pastures.

You’re Just Not The Same Anymore.

Have you gained weight? Stopped dressing up for him? Become a slacker when it comes to shaving your legs or putting on your makeup?

As much as you’d like to think he loves you for your insides, his passion for you is also based on what you look like. If you’re not as hot as you used to be, then his passion for you will be equally… lukewarm.

You Nag Like Marge Simpson.

If every time he does something, he has to hear every reason why it’s a bad idea, he’s going to stop sharing things with you. No man is going to be attracted to a woman who’s always telling him everything he’s doing is wrong.

You’re Just Not Thrilling Anymore.

If your life is the same old, same old, he’s going to get bored. If your bedroom activities have the predictability of a flowchart, he’s going to seek the bed of someone who is more exciting.

You’re Fighting Biology.

Biologically speaking, men are hardwired to spread their seed among as many women as possible. They’re driven to create as many possible offspring as possible with as many types of women as possible. It’s in their DNA.

Monogamy is a social construct and some men just can’t manage to fight off the basic urge to merge.

It’s Just Sex.

Sometimes when a guy cheats, it’s only about sex. He’s satisfying a biological urge and it really DOES “mean nothing” to him. (Try telling most women that, though!)

If he feels that the benefits of sex outweigh the risk of losing his current relationship, then he’ll do it.

What Can You Do To Avoid Being Cheated On?

Easy. Take care of yourself. Develop a close relationship. Don’t nag. Be supportive.

Find ways to keep things exciting and new. And most important, realize that no relationship is 100% cheat-proof if the other person wants to cheat. All you can do is do your best to keep things healthy and happy.

I’ll tell you, but first let me tell you a story about my junior school days.

Get in the wayback machine and let’s back up to being a tween. Hormones are starting to come into play. Girls are ruthlessly teasing the boys; boys are ruthlessly teasing the girls.

And I was the evil matchmaker. Evil because I realized the trick that could get any girl and any boy together (and I used it!).

What was the trick? It was so easy, it’s laughable.

I’d go up to the boy and say, “Hey Matt, did you know Samantha likes you? She was totally talking yesterday about how cute and funny you are.”

Then I’d seek out the girl and spin a similar tale. “Sam, I was totally just talking to Matt and he said he thinks you’re the prettiest girl in class. Seriously! I think he likes you!”

Within a few days Matt and Samantha were dating, well, as much as you can call junior school relationship dating.

The key to this evil matchmaker routine I had is still useful in adult life.

People like people who they think like them.

As simple as it sounds, it’s the truth.

Matt and Sam had no interest in each other before I planted the seeds in their minds. They became a couple for no other reason than the fact that they thought the other person liked them.

Often, our communications sink like the Titanic because we’re too interested in ourselves. We’re self-absorbed. When the other person is talking, we’re only half listening. We think that the success of the conversation will hinge on the witty reply we have that keeps the conversation going. After all, nobody wants dead air! That would be horrible! Doom and destruction arise when there is a gap in the conversation!

Have you ever met a person who you instantly liked?
For me, that person is Kimmy, my best friend’s sister. When I first met Kim, she offered me a beer, made solid eye contact, smiled, and seemed genuinely happy to have met me.

We sat in the living room and she asked about my job. She sat facing me, leaning in, really focusing on what I had to say. After a pause, she would ask a thoughtful question or make a comment that made me feel like she was truly interested in me.

To this day, Kim is probably one of my favorite people. It’s also no surprise that she makes major bank in the customer service industry. She’s got the personality for it!

Shining the spotlight on the person who is talking is the best way to make them like you. Relax and let them steal the show.

When they pause, just smile. Take a moment to think about what they’ve said. Then ask a question that shows you’ve been listening and want to learn more about something they’ve said.

Go into a conversation with the expectation that you’ll learn about the other person.

If you go in with the goal of “get her to like me,” it will be harder to gauge your success and you’ll become frustrated and lose confidence if she doesn’t jump across the table to kiss you.

If you change your purpose from “get her to like me” to “learn about her”, then your chances for success are much closer to 100%.

If you’re showing her that you’re interested, she’ll read that as you liking her.

Did you know 88% of women assume that men are NOT interested when they first meet them? Seriously!

You can put her at ease immediately and express your interest in her just by making eye contact and listening. Show her that she’s important to you and that you’re interested in the things that she is passionate about. It’s that easy.

Changing your beliefs is another way to be successful in flirting or getting your ex back.

If you go into a flirting encounter assuming it will be tough and that she probably won’t like you, then your body will be sending subliminal messages reflecting your insecurity.

This is equally true if you’re trying to get your ex back. Don’t enter the situation on the defensive with your back to the wall. Go into the situation with a positive frame of mind, and this will then naturally show in your body language AND actions.

Go into the situation assuming that she already likes you and you’ll be much more confident. Your body language will communicate that you’re confident and at ease. Way more attractive, isn’t it?

Human beings mirror each other’s body language, so if you’re sending message that you’re confident and interested in her, she can’t help but send the same messages back to you.

Square off your bodies (face her directly), make direct and sustained eye contact, smile, and listen actively when she speaks. Show her that you’re interested in her and she’ll show that she’s interested in you.

Sound simple? That’s because it is. Now get out there and put your voodoo magic to work!