he's back

One of my good friends is a Psychologist – someone I’ve known since university days. Anyway, I had him and his wife over for dinner last night, and the 4 of us got talking on the psychology that goes on when one has just been dumped.

Here are some pretty easy tricks that will get your ex thinking along the right lines – the line that gets them to call you up begging for a second chance!

Some of these tricks are subtle, others verge on a bit dirty. It’s up to you and your morals as to which you’d like to employ.

Subtle Psychological Tricks

mirror body language

Mirroring – If you get a chance to talk with your ex, mirror his actions.

If he rubs his nose, you rub your nose. If he takes a sip of his drink, you take a sip of yours. This sends the psychological signal that you two are “in sync” which is very attractive.

Speak Well of Them – If you’re in contact with mutual acquaintances, speak highly of your ex.

Mention all the things that you loved about them.

How cool would it be if your ex called you up and said, “Ya’ know, I thought you were a jerk, but my sister said you’ve been telling her how much you still respect me…”

A Little Touch – This is a pickup artist trick but is effective with exes as well.

If you’re with your ex, find an excuse to touch them. One sure-fire method is to reach toward their face as if to brush away a stray eyelash. This is the type of touch that implies intimacy, so will send a message to your ex’s brain that you’re still close with each other.

Semi-Sneaky Psychological Tricks

Oopsy Text Messages – Send your ex a text that says something to the effect of “I had a great time, too. Thanks! See you again soon!”

If your ex texts you back (or even better, calls!) you can play it off like you had a great date and to your embarrassment, your date’s name was just one name above your ex’s in your contact list. Oops!

change your bad habits

Switcheroo – You know at least some of the reasons why you were dumped. What better time than the present to change all those bad habits?

Make sure your ex sees you in your better clothes, with a new hairstyle, quitting smoking, helping old ladies cross the street, whatever it is that they would find insanely attractive.

Sneaky Psychological Tricks

Fake Date – Find a friend of the opposite sex that is willing to pretend to be your date and go to a place where you’re sure to bump into your ex.

Ham it up as much as you’re comfortable with – stare into each other’s eyes, hold hands, the works. Want to amp it up another notch? When you make eye contact with your ex, visibly draw back from your “date.”

That evening, write your ex an email saying that when you saw them, you knew there was nobody else who could possibly fill their shoes.

Date Their Friend – For those who want to play a dirty trick, find the friend of your ex who has always had a thing for you and date them.

It might be a fun rebound relationship, it might pan out into a real relationship, or you could achieve the ultimate goal of getting your ex so jealous that they’ll be dying to get you back.

Be forewarned, this is bringing another party into the situation who could/will get hurt as a result. I’m not advocating this method, but if you feel you have no other options, it may be something you’d like to do.

don't look desperate

Be Cold and Uncaring – Neediness is the most unattractive emotion you can convey. Be the opposite – cold and uncaring.

If your ex calls you, send it immediately to voicemail. When they leave a message, call them back and say “Hey, sorry I didn’t answer. I didn’t recognise the number since I had deleted your name from my contact list right after you dumped me.”

Showing your ex that you don’t care about them anymore may be the way to trick them into trying to get you back (instead of the other way around).

It’s up to you to decide which of these methods will work best for your situation and your morals. Whatever you choose – good luck!